Yes, it is that time of year again. There is a crisp nip in the air, it gets dark earlier, and small children walk from door-to-door asking strangers for candy. Why do we do this? I am seriously not feeling this whole halloween thing. A friend of mine gave this holiday the biblical attention it deserves here, so if you want something sound regarding this holiday you'll be happier reading what she has to say.
I simply want to whine. Don't get me wrong. I like dressing up in silly costumes just as much as the next guy. Maybe even more than the next guy. Since I've never met the next guy, though, I can't say for sure. What I can say is I am not happy with the candy issue. Is it me or does this feel a bit like extortion to anyone else? I did not plan on having piles of candy in my home, just waiting to hand to a stranger at the door. As I was returning from work, however, I started thinking. Things always go wrong when I start to think.
If I don't have candy, I'll have to leave the porch light off. Then the entire neighborhood will know I am not participating in this annual event. I could have my front door silly-stringed. It happened one halloween a couple of years ago when we spent the evening at our church "fall festival" event, handing out candy there. But the people who came to our door just thought we were cheapskates and joykills and I still have blue string stuck to the wood in my front door! Besides, I don't want to be the house everyone points at and says, "See that house? Those are the mean people who didn't have candy at halloween!" That kind of reputation can take YEARS to live down! I don't want to be the bad guy of the neighborhood and I don't want to clean egg off my front door, so I turned into the grocery store on the way home.
I walked out of the store $30 poorer and a bit resentful, but knowing this act was necessary for the preservation of the neighborhood peace. Check out the definition of "extort" and see if you agree with me or not.
In reality, I guess it doesn't really matter what it is. I still have candy to give away. Kit Kats and Peanut Butter Cups, my favorites. Oh. I also bought a big bag of cheap candy for those way-too-old trick-or-treaters who seem to show up around 9pm after their little sisters get home and they are jealous of their divine sugar-filled booty (that's a pirate term, appropriate for such a night, don't you think?). Giving such last-minute candy seekers my special candy would be like casting pearls before swine. Besides, if anyone is getting the leftover kit kats, it's ME!
As a bit of reward for forcing yourself to read all of this, I will share a link to a site I found entertaining. Check out the Top 5 Haunted Places in America. I've been to three of them. My football-shaped "Facing the Giants" refrigerator magnet goes to the first person who can correctly name which three! Sorry, kids, immediate family is disqualified. Love You!
Whether you observe this holiday or not, I wish you peace and safety tonight. And, as we learned from Veggitales, God IS bigger than the boogeyman!
1 comment:
We have a winner! I'll get the magnet to you soon. Thanks for playing!
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